INTERN generally demurs from writing about fiction queries, because that subject is already covered so expertly by blogs like queryshark, pitch clinic and others. But over the past few months, INTERN has been seeing pretty decent fiction queries, followed up by really awful (or almost good, but not quite—which is more awful than truly awful) fiction chapters, and little stores of irkdom and despair have been building up in her heart. Then there was the Writing Retreat, where much Fiction Writing Advice was bandied about, and many of the recurring characteristics of these pseudo-interesting submissions suddenly made sense.
Hence, INTERN is declaring the next 7-10 days (or however long it takes to write 7 posts) F&M week (Fiction and its cousin, Memoir).
Topics to be covered include: higher metaphors! those pesky organisms called characters! suspense—yes, even memoirs need it! how not to write for kids! (in case you haven't been listening to Editorial Anonymous) how to make $ writing while you're waiting for that huge book deal! and so much more! there will be jousting and pancakes, too.
PS. Why don't you read The Rejectionist? Tis a lark!
PPS: OK, for anyone interested, the First Chapter Jousting Match is, indeed, still on and running until 5 PM tomorrow (thursday). Rules are still: send INTERN the first chapter of your unpublished novel or memoir and $10 (internspills @ gmail.com) on paypal. If it's cooked (i.e. ready to be submitted to an agent or editor as a sample chapter), INTERN sends you $20. If it's uncooked, you get $10 credit towards any editing service by INTERN. The clock is a'ticking!
Update:INTERN has been getting lots of Fiction jousters, but so far no Memoir jousters. What's going on? Onwards, brave memoirists!