Thursday, March 25, 2010

INTERN: Going Rogue

It has been two very short (but also very long) months since INTERN first entered Venerable McPulitzer's well-oiled doors and, as hinted yesterday, INTERN's time at that discerning establishment is almost at its conclusion. INTERN had discussed the possibility of a shorter-than-usual term with Venny McP in advance and now, with one month remaining until her own book comes out, it seems fair to say that her time would be better spent pleasing her (regal and angelic) publicist than cleaning out Venny McP's distinguished office supply closet for the second time in a month.

Not everyone has the luxury of quitting their COMPLETELY UNPAID job in order to focus on book promotion, manuscript critiques, and the occasional spring mushroom foray, but the oracular chickens have smiled on INTERN in this respect and she is ready to roll.

At Venerable McPulitzer, INTERN learned the art of writing incisive manuscript assessments, using a soft and discreet Telephone Voice when speaking to important-but-obscure surrealist authors, and printing every rejection letter twelve times (at unspeakable expense to Canadian old-growth forests) in order to select only the printout on the crispest page, with the sharpest ink, to convey Venerable McPulitzers heartfelt regrets. It has been a somewhat absurd experience, but a good one overall.

INTERN will still be offering manuscript critiques and other editorial services, and will continue to update this blog (although, of course, the direction it will take is unclear!)

Tomorrow is INTERN's requisite Awkward Goodbye Luncheon with Executive Ed and his Venerable Rockettes...wish her luck!

32 comments:

  1. Make sure you thank your oracular chickens.

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  2. Much luck to you! Burn no bridges, though - they might be your next publisher.

    When will you tell us more about your book?

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  3. a soft and discreet telephone voice is essential in this world. good luck with lunch!

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  4. Would love to see posts of your promotional foray!

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  5. Congrats! Hope they feed INTERN cake tomorrow!

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  6. Best of luck with the awkward lunch tomorrow (ick) and with your book, too!

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  7. CONGRATS! and keep the blog rolling, your insights into publicity will be stellar!

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  8. are you going to tell us about your book?!
    of course you will no longer be anon INTERN anymore, but i want to read it!

    good luck with the lunch!

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  9. Good luck, I'd love to buy the book, but you're anonymous... I'm sure there are others in my boat too.

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  10. Good luck! SHame you can't let us know more about that book. Or is there some clever way that you can?

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  11. Godspeed, INTERN. Venny McP's will be a poorer place without you.

    And if you learn of any new blogs, hosted by a witty writer promoting her upcoming release, you could always give us a nudge in that direction, yes? *wink wink*

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  12. Good luck! I hope the Venerable Rockettes send you off with a big dance number. A big, discreet, surrealist dance number of course.

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  13. I thought the oracular chickens were smiling at me once, but unfortunately it was just gas.

    Good luck!!!

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  14. If the Executive Editor gives you a card, you *will* be flinging it into the wastebasket with appropriate cusswords, won't you?

    j/k Good luck with your book.

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  15. Two features attracted and engaged me with INTERN spills' blog: INTERN's gutsy, lighthearted, irreverent voice, and INTERN's insider scoop from the perspective of the lowest of the low proles.

    Proles often have a unique perspective, experiencing a setting from a fresh and unbiased viewpoint and from being nearly invisible to high muckety-mucks. I don't think voice alone will hold my interest. What's the next insider scoop?

    I've been a publishing intern myself, for nine months, and played just about every other role in the publishing pipeline, except agent and owner. I say no thank you to those roles.

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  16. Are you going to let us know what your book is called when it comes out so we can buy it?

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  18. Look at all of us asking about your book! Spill it, sister! :)

    And where can I pick me up a few oracular chickens?

    You will do great tomorrow, I can feel it!
    :)
    G.

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  19. Oh, or is that today!
    Tell, tell!
    How'd it go????
    :)
    G.

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  20. I don't see any point to uncalled for personal criticisms.

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  21. in this detective's opinion, INTERN looks suspiciously like Joanna Newsom. So I'll be checking the places of bookselling for titles by her.

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  22. Helen: OMG you have figured it out!

    Genella: 'twas epic. Think Stepford Interns sipping champagne out of plastic flutes, Assistant Ed piling INTERN with more free books than she can carry, and Executive Ed lurking in a corner eating all the guacamole.

    Everyone: thanks for the well-wishing! and INTERN's bests to all!

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